No, I'm not really back...
... But every now and then I do take a walk down memory lane and even if this little blog is no longer part of my present, it's been very much an integral part of my past. I've spent plenty of time (way too much!) here sharing my thoughts, feelings and happenings and reading the same of other people I've "gotten to know" along the way. And it's still a home that I hold dear to my heart.
So why now? And why write again? And ultimately the question, what has changed since?
There must have been something that drew me back. There always was. I've come back occasionally from time to time in the last almost 1.5 years that I've remained silent, and almost always to read old entries and be reminded of a particular situation that I knew would have been documented here.
But somehow it is only now that I ever felt the need to write here again... Even if only for now.
I've since taken to penning down long excessive emails to a few selected friends, sharing my life and fulfilling a certain need to think and express myself in the written word. But the truth is, my life has gotten a lot less interesting, the way it seems to be as you grow older. Here was always a place where I only discussed my dating life and specifically kept the other aspects of my life separate. And I guess as time passed, the other aspects of my real life seemed to happen more frequently than any exciting escapades.
So where then are we all now?
My previously constant partner-in-crime, my (now ex) party girl moved back again after having left the country for 2 years. But we've stopped partying for much longer than that and have since moved onto dinner, casual drinks and early nights.
As expected, most of the guys featured here are long gone and out of contact with my only source of any information on their life being from Facebook, if at all.
I am however still working with "wayne rooney" and the last I saw him in March, we are still as "close" as ever. But we also still remain based in different country offices.
And 4 years on, the alpha boy and I are still together. There have been ups and downs and right now I'm not even quite sure if I'm on the way up or down. But well, somehow we are still hanging on and trying to make this work.
I've met a few new guys especially in the last year through work and church (as I tried to get more in touch with my spiritual side) but all truly platonic and whom I'm thankful that they have become guys that I think I could really call as friends. The most interesting thing on the guy front to have happened to me this week was having a guy tell me about how he was telling someone else that girls like me are not all that common and that lucky he's leaving (the country) or he would probably have been chasing me. And the compliment was all that more sweet because he seemed like a genuine, decent, funny and even quite attractive bloke. Though I'm not all that sure how complimentary it is that he felt thankful that he was leaving the country haha!
Essentially I'm at the point in my life where partying, excessive drinking and making out with random guys are not just my past, but no longer of any interest to me... at all. And it's pretty much the same for my friends too. What has now occupied our time have been proper dinner catch ups and mini vacations. Our conversations have progressed from parties and the latest guy we met (though both still have their place) to career, financial planning and purchasing a home. Some of us embraced our singlehood, others our coupledom and for others both at one point or another. But we've all grown up and moved on... Together.
Labels: insights into jo